Thursday, February 22, 2007

Dream on, my friend

It's been a rough start to 2007. First Neko, then my friend Renee. I met Renee when I first moved to Detroit in 1991. She was one of the first people I met and we were instant friends. She had the same goofy personality I did. She understood me when I was being totally stupid and I understood her, too. There was so much we had in common. We had a connection you don't get to find in too many people. I loved her like a sister, and I know she felt the same about me. She'll forever be a huge part of my life and a soul I felt honored to have been connected to for so long.

She had a rough time for the past few years. I moved from Detroit to Central PA and we didn't get to see each other that often. We talked on the phone alot in the beginning. We both got divorced around the same time. Shortly after that, I lost touch with her. She had lost her job, so I couldn't call her at work, her cell phone got shut off, so I couldn't reach her there, and I didn't know the people she was staying with. I had no idea how to find her. I tried for the past 3 years. I Googled her name, her daughters name, even her ex-husband. I didn't try too hard to find her ex, because I figured I'd find her someday. I thought I'd find a company listing of employees and she'd be there. Or, I'd find some post she'd make online somewhere. I started wondering what I did, did I make her mad? I got a little mad at her for just leaving me like that. I couldn't believe that after we had been SO close and shared SO much that my best friend would forsake me. That was hard enough, then on February 5, I searched again, like I usually did. It didn't take me long to find a post a friend of hers had put on MySpace.

The post simply said, "Renee Franzen passed away Dec 13." Her friend was letting someone else know, and had she not written Renee's full name, I might never have known...But there it was, not even 2 months, but too late to find my best friend. And that's what I found.

The why or the how doesn't need to be said here. What needs to be said here is that I'm full to the brim with memories of her and they're almost entirely good. She was SO special and everyone I know felt the same way about her. I miss her terribly and I'm so sad that I didn't get to say goodbye. I found out that she wasn't mad at me, and she couldn't get ahold of me either.

Her favorite band was Aerosmith. She LOVED that band. She had every CD, she'd been to probably every concert. She and I went to one together once, and it was fantastic. She met Steven Tyler once and I remember her gushing about it for months! :)

I haven't had the heart to post this about her until today when I was listening to my Aerosmith CD and thinking about her. I had to post this and say that I think Dream On is the perfect song for her. We used to sing songs together all the time, and in this song he says, "Sing with me, sing for the years, sing for the laughter and sing for the tears , sing with me, if it's just for today, maybe tomorrow the good Lord will take you away..." And he did. God bless your beautiful soul my dear sweet friend. I'll love you forever and I'll miss you for every minute of it.

This is an old picture. It was her birthday party for her 26th birthday, but I remember this day like it was yesterday.

Dream On, Aerosmith

every time that I look in the mirror

all these lines on my face getting clearer

the past is gone it went by like dusk to dawn

isn't that the way everybody's got their dues in life to pay

yeah, I know nobody knows where it comes and where it goes

I know it's everybody's sin

you got to lose to know how to win

half my life's in books' written pages

live and learn from fools and from sages

you know it's true all the things come back to you

sing with me, sing for the years

sing for the laughter and sing for the tears

sing with me, if it's just for today

maybe tomorrow the good Lord will take you away

dream on, dream on, dream on,

dream yourself a dream come true

dream on, dream on, dream on, and

dream until your dream comes true dream on ...

1 comment:

Shaylen said...

I am so very sorry about your friend...its sad that you didn't even know..lots of hugs to you.